Having brought you Football’s most offensive sayings, here are the 25 stupidest quotes to ever grace our game. Footballers aren’t exactly known for their brains, but some of the commentators have no excuse:
25. Phil Neville – The Brazilians were South American, and the Ukranians will be more European.
24. Lawrie McMenemy – When you are 4-0 up you should never lose 7-1.
23. Terry Venables – If history repeats itself, I should think we can expect the same thing.
22. Ian Rush – I couldn’t settle in Italy, it was like living in a foreign country.
21. Barry Venison – I always used to put my right boot on first, and then obviously my right sock.
20. Ruud Gullit – We must have had 99 per cent of the match. It was the other three per cent that cost us.
19. Paul Gascoigne – I’ve had 14 bookings this season – 8 of which were my fault, but 7 of which were disputable.
18. Glenn Hoddle – When a player gets to 30, so does his body.
17. Bryan Robson – It wasn’t going to be our day on the night.
16. David Coleman – If that had gone in, it would have been a goal.
15. Alan Green – It was the game that put the Everton ship back on the road.
14. Ugo Ehiogu – I’m as happy as I can be – but I have been happier.
13. Kevin Keegan – Argentina won’t be at Euro 2000 because they’re fromSouth America.
12. Alan Ball – I don’t believe in luck… but I do believe you need it.
11. Mark Viduka – I would not be bothered if we lost every game as long as we won the league.
10. Tom Ferrie – Dumbarton player Steve McCahill has limped off with a badly cut forehead.
9. Vinnie Jones – Winning doesn’t really matter as long as you win.
8. Stuart Pearce – I can see the carrot at the end of the tunnel.
7. Peter Jones – Sporting Lisbon in their green and white hoops, looking like a team of zebras.
6. Jonathan Woodgate – Leeds is a great club and it’s been my home for years, even though I live in Middlesbrough.
5. Ron Atkinson – Well, Clive, it’s all about the two M’s – movement and positioning.
4. Metro Radio – Julian Dicks is everywhere. It’s like they’ve got eleven Dicks on the field.
3. Mark Draper – I’d like to play for an Italian club, like Barcelona.
2. David Beckham – I definitely want Brooklyn to be christened, but I don’t know into what religion yet.
1. Ron Greenwood – Playing with wingers is more effective against European sides like Brazil, than English sides like Wales.